When I was much younger, I had a different expectation of who I will be at 28. I was sure I would be a medical doctor, possibly married with kids, have my own car and probably already own a house by now.
Truth is, I am nowhere near any of those. I'm going to be honest with you, it took me a while to come to terms with the things that I know I will never get to do or achieve by a certain age that I had predefined in my head. I'm done being sad, questioning the 'what ifs' because I know now, this is exactly where I am meant to be.
Often times I need to pinch myself, am I really 28 now? It's not because I don't want or scared to grow old, but I can't believe how fast time moves. It flies, for real! Internally, I don't feel 28. Alhamdulillah, because I am unmarried, I still live with both my parents and they have never, ever set any expectations of how I should be behaving at 28. I am not saying I misbehave, but they let me be a single, unmarried lady. Simply put, I still feel like I am a teenager under my parents' care, but now with money, hahaha.
At 28, I am not a doctor like I hoped to be when I was a teen, but I would tell you I am proud of my career, proud of who I am professionally. I think why I wanted to be a doctor in the first place came from a desire to help people and to be of benefit to others. Up until now, in my prayers I hope to be an added value to the life of others & be a real benefit to the ones closest to me, my community and InshaAllah, to Ummah as a whole.
At 28, I am not married with children like I thought I would when I was much younger, but I believe in Allah's wisdom. I pray for a lot in a spouse with specific criteria and it's only fair that Allah give me ample time to perfect my own self to reflect the same qualities I want in a partner. I acknowledge whatever I wish for in a husband, I need to have the same in myself too. I am not rushing into it, I am not desperate for it, I am grateful for the extra time Allah is giving me to pray for the one and I know for a fact, Allah will not disappoint me.
Don't I feel anything seeing my friends move into that phase of life (getting married and being a mom)? I am a human after all, of course I do. The feeling was stronger in my mid 20's than now, though. For some reason at 28, I am able to just celebrate people without whining 'when will it be my turn?'.
My rizq is abundant in different aspects and Alhamdulillah the quicker I acknowledge this and count my own blessings, the better it is. Not once I feel lonely. I have my Mom, my sisters, my friends (loads of them!) that will always be around. At 28, instead of complaining about the things I have yet to achieve, I am counting the things I am blessed with. Far beyond the materials, I am grateful for the ability to see what truly matters; my sound heart, my conscious mind, and the desire to seek instead of settling.
Regardless of how I imagined 28 would look like before, I am now living my best life that is given by Allah. Life is full of mysteries and mine is unfolding beautifully.
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